Even middle age adults who come to a movie because they likely enjoy films and take them a bit seriously, are completely incapable of going into the auditorium, finding a seat, sitting down, and shutting the fuck up. This demographic still thinks they are in their own living room and feel the need to make comments in something resembling a normal speaking voice. Guess what? When the lights go down and the green preview screen shows up, the movie has started. The unwashed masses make the argument that they paid $7 just like everybody else, they should be able to talk as desired. No. You fucking cannot do that at all. Other people paid $7 to listen and enjoy the movie and not listen to you make some poorly thought out comment at the talking picture show. Quit farting around, chew with your mouth closed, stop digging in your bag, and stop with the hard candy unwrapping. Be an adult, be aware of your surroundings, stop being selfish, and shut the fuck up when you are at a movie.

You might think that the above rant would have made its point and things could just move forward. Nope. There is more that needs to be said. A scene of the English countryside appears on the screen. It is not necessary to say to your friend, “That looks just like a place I went to when I was over there.” Was that really necessary? No, it was not. Your friend/date/wife/mistress cares NOTHING about what you just said and either do the 23 people who are close enough to hear your profound thought. In addition, you make think you are slick and cool by whispering. The loudest thing in a dark movie theatre is some jack-hole whispering. Another statement that nobody needs to hear EVER, “That couldn’t happen in real life you know.” Are you telling me that a mild mannered Nuclear Physicist who turns green and spurts forth with a full body growth expansion when he gets angry really cannot stop a full loaded passenger training on the spot with merely a punch? Come on Brad, take that back, of course that could really happen. Thanks for the insight to all things possible you fucking mental midget.

Evidence of the dumbing down of American is never more clear and present than hearing people talk during a movie. Too many are physically and mentally incapable of sitting still and being silent. It is time that the hive mind turns away from the lowest common denominator and taking the easy route and turning towards being comfortable with silence and with paying attention beyond 30 seconds.